For Gary, Bakersfield has always been home. It’s where he went to school, built his career, and now raises his youngest son, Edward. Edward is 11 years old, non‑verbal, autistic, and full of life. Before becoming his full-time caregiver, Gary worked in fabrication and security. His life was straightforward then; clock in, clock out, go home. But when Gary realized his son needed more support, he stepped into a role he never expected but fully embraced.
“He was still young when I started noticing he wasn’t talking or doing some of the things my grandson — who’s a few months younger — was already doing. They grew up together, so it was easy to see the difference. When my grandson started talking and Edward still hadn’t, that’s when I realized he was going to need some extra help.”
Because Edward is non-verbal, he communicates through hand gestures, facial expressions, and sounds. There are times when everyday moments like being in a crowd, hearing certain noises, or being around unfamiliar people, can overwhelm him. But in the middle of all that uncertainty, Gary is his anchor. His calm. His safety.
He describes caregiving as meaningful but lonely. Some days, the cold glares and quiet judgment when Edward is struggling can feel defeating, but Gary has learned to push past the negativity. “People see Edward struggle and assume the worst. They don’t see my boy the way I do. I just wish those people understood how hard and isolating it can be.”
His days begin by helping Edward with the restroom, brushing his teeth, washing his face, making sure he feels clean and comfortable. He sets up Edward’s tablet with familiar shows to ease the transition to the school bus. While Edward is gone, Gary tries to get his errands and appointments done. Evenings are spent practicing life skills, reinforcing routines, and creating the stability he needs.
Caregiving for an autistic child doesn’t stop, it shifts from one need to the next.
The IHSS program allows Gary to stay home and give Edward the care he depends on. But getting approved wasn’t easy. Gary was denied multiple times. “I was told I couldn’t be paid to care for my own child. The process was discouraging and then I found out about the union.”
He joined UDW in 2021, and everything changed. The union encouraged him not to give up. They walked him through appeals, helped him understand his rights, until he finally won approval.
UDW also helped him find his voice. He began attending events, speaking out at actions, and advocating for caregivers like himself. He learned that his voice mattered, not just for Edward, but for thousands of families facing the same struggles.
“As a caregiver, I’m supporting my son who depends on me for everything,” he says. “But I also need stability myself. This work is demanding, and we need higher wages and benefits so we can stay healthy and keep caring for our loved ones.”
Every day, Gary builds a life where Edward can feel safe, loved, and understood.
Gary’s hopes for Edward’s future are centered around greater independence and communication. His biggest wish is for Edward to manage his own personal care, so he can grow with dignity and autonomy. He also dreams of the day Edward will be able to speak. For Gary, these two milestones would be rewarding.
Discover more inspiring member stories at udw.org/our-stories.